Sunday, June 7, 2015

How to Be a Good Friend!

When we go thru difficult times having friends can carry us during the storm.. As a therapist, I am thrilled when I hear about how a client's friends have been there and supported someone going thru a difficult season.

What is difficult is:  How to be a good friend?

These simple guidelines can help you to be the support you want to be.

1. Listen
2. Only ask questions that help with the issue. Not out of your own interest
3. Do not give advice. We do this when we are uncomfortable or we want them to do what we would do.
     The reality is please realize your suggestions may not be what works or can be realistic for your friend.
4. Follow up, checking in to see how a friend is doing: helps and let's them know you really are there.
5. Allow humor and share your struggle not how you handled it. You do not want your friend to feel they have failed if they do not do it your (the right)  way.

For those going thru struggles.
1. Chose only a few people you are 100% comfortable with.
2. Share, vent and laugh.. knowing you are not alone really does take off some of the stress.
3. Return the favor down the road.

We all have seasons of hardship, grief, frustrations and loss. Walk along the path with someone and they will walk along the path with you. Make sure your motives to support are pure and your concern real.